Chandri MacLeod (chandri) wrote,
Chandri MacLeod

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The consequences of taking oneself too seriously... ;)

My dad sent this to me... I just couldn't resist. :)


Bitter after being snubbed for membership in
the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China, and Syria
today announced they had formed the "Axis of
Just as Evil," which they said would be way
eviler than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North
Korea axis President Bush warned of his State
of the Union address.

Axis of Evil members, however, immediately
dismissed the new axis as having, for starters,
a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as their dreams!" declared North Korean
leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody knows we're the
best evils... best at being evil... we're the
best." Diplomats from Syria denied they were
jealous over being excluded, although they
conceded they did ask if they could join the
Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said
Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. "An Axis
can't have more than three countries,"
explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein.
"This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World
War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in
the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And
a secret handshake. Ours is wicked cool."


International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil
declaration was swift, as within minutes,
France surrendered.

Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to
gain triumvirate status in what became a game
of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia
said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil,
forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar
in the Axis of Occasionally Evil, while
Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the
Axis of Not So Much Evil Really As Just
Generally Disagreeable.

With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the
desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El
Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the
Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But
Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics;
Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of
Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But
Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America,
while Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand
established the Axis of Countries That Be
Allowed to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick. "That's
not a threat, really, just something we like to
do," said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack

While wondering if the other nations of the
world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a
cautious Bush granted approval for most axes,
although he rejected the establishment of the
Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "Guay,"
accusing one of its members of filing a false
application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay,
and Chadguay denied the charges.

Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to
join any Axis, but privately, world leaders
said that's only because no one asked them.</>

(I especially like this part: Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of
Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But
Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America... snicker.)

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