Chandri MacLeod (chandri) wrote,
Chandri MacLeod

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Jungle Plane Crash Mystery Adventure commentary

(I think that's what I'm going to call it from now on. ;)

Okay. Seen Lost part two. The creepiest part?

Runner-up: The polar bear. The polar bear makes me think that the big thing *is* dinosaurs, or something like that, and that the island is some kind of menagerie set up by aliens.

That's right. I said aliens. I'm throwing my hat in with "aliens". You all remember I said that so that when it turns out it's an evil wizard you can laugh at me. (Oh, yeah. My other theory is vague but some variant on an evil wizard. Or other prehistoric/mythological but still very terrestrial monster. Yes. *nods*)

Creepiest thing? "Sixteen years. It has been repeating sixteen years." (Sayid is one of my favourites so far - we likes Naveen Andrews. He pulls off the shaken-voice very well.) THE BLOODY RADIO VOICES. I have never been realistically freaked out by French before. And the French woman was almost as creepy as the robot voice. Also her French was horrendous. It's Verb, Subject, Object, silly American technical advisor. The grammar, WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE GRAMMAR?!

She also didn't sound freaked out at all, certainly not considering she was describing the horrible and (one assumes) gory death of all her companions which left her completely alone, presumably to be devoured by flesh-rending monster. (I almost wrote "flesh-eating", but then I remembered that this is a much more playful sort of monster that prefers to savage his victims and then hang them at the tops of two-storey trees like Christmas ornaments. I re-iterate: she didn't sound freaked out, AT ALL.) I don't know if the weird and inappropriate calm was trauma, bad acting, or some weird North American conceit that the French are cold heartless monsters who never panic. (And in opposition to this let me *not* tell you about my grade ten Francais Langue teacher who screamed obscenities, threw chalk and erasers, kept a bottle of tequila in his desk drawer, and once put a desk in front of the classroom door and sat on it to keep us from getting out at break as some form of bizarre punishment, freaking us out sufficiently that we once mounted a complex secret op involving hidden recording devices, including one student who taped a microphone cable up the inside of his arm so as to get the best reception out the end of his sleeve. Yes. The French are calm people. Well. Quebecois high school teachers. Although it should be noted that our class had eleven different teachers for the same class over a period of three years, so maybe that's a bad example. ;))

I'm very creeped out, now. And I am alone. It's scary. I need to watch something puerile and shiny, or Disney, now. Ooh. Something with singing.

EDIT: I breezed through Television Without Pity to read the Lost review, and it referred to a Firefly review, and I read the Objects in Space review, and it occurs to me that maybe the reason River never saw/heard Kaylee reveal any of her secret thoughts (the creepy stone-faced side-line things) is because Kaylee is so ridiculously honest and innocent and doesn't have any deep-down secret thoughts like the others? Hrm.

NERDY IMMERSION MINORITY EDIT: French is the most frequently used language in English-language television, aside,of course, from English. Sometimes I'm watching something and a character rambles off into French (fairly frequently discussing something that actually does have relevance to the plot), and I boggle at how many people in the Western world are just... *not* getting this joke, or not soaking up that plot point. Books, too. (Yes, I am a snooty bilingual. ;) I mean, it isn't always crucial, but sometimes it's... like... you're missing a whole level.

Actually, maybe that just reflects bad scriptwriting. ;)

Oh my gods, Nathan Fillion is in Blast from the Past. OHMYGODS. That is so... WEIRD. He's the creepy boyfriend, though. That's not so weird. His haircut has not changed in ten years. ;)

DOWN WITH CAPITALISM EDIT: See, this is why I attempt (mostly unsuccessfully) to avoid watching American TV. The commmercials scare me. Especially the "come to this six-month pseudo-school and get this high-pressure, high-responsibility, high-paying job without exchanging equivalent amounts of time or effort or commitment!" Like, what the hell is a "surgical technologist"? Is this some kind of highly-specialised nurse? Or is it yet another corporate-society variation on job-within-a-job-within-a-job-to-avoid-socialist-centralised-government-control-of-anything? I was watching this commercial and thinking: "Um. If I'm in surgery? I want the SURGEONS to be DOCTORS assisted by NURSES. Thanks. Freaks."

TUMMY RUMBLE OF EDIT: Grilled cheese and tomato soup. Yes. I am a culinary genius. (Also, Nadja? I do not seem to actually have the Eisenmarche CD here. I think I must have left it in Maple Ridge.)


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