November 15th, 2004


(no subject)

Watched what was apparently a new episode of Crossing Jordan with Mum last night in which the perky blonde doctor (to whom I had been relatively indifferent but was warming up to) apparentlyperhaps died in a plane crash, although they never found remains, and to hell with what they said about burning up in the point of impact, that's the sort of crap they pull in this show. The whole episode was actually remarkably like the first episode I saw of this show, where a guy blew up a building to kill an office of lawyers who advised them to wait for a settlement against a company that poisoned their kids and the kids died... it was complicated. Anyway, everybody was awake for three days and they were sifting through the wreckage with... uh... sieves, actually, and were identifying people by shoesize, and stuff like that. Kind of the same, except this time it was a plane, and there was an actual subplot about a missing kid with a liver disorder, or something.

The important part of this diatribe is that at the end of the episode, Garrett called the whole cast and some extras together at the middle of the wreckage and read a poem, and cried. And I really, really liked the poem. And I think I've heard it somewhere before. But I can't find it! And it's nowhere online, not even in anybody's episode guides yet because it's a new episode. It was something like... "As I stood on the mountaintop," and "I saw a great bird," and "fresh eyes, taking up the sight of her," and ended with "here she comes," and it was sappy and hopeful and I liked it, and I want the full text, but I can't find it. I don't know if maybe I'm imagining having heard/read it before, or maybe it's supposed to be in-script, like Jordan or Garrett or hell, Devan, wrote it and that's where it came from... but I can't find the full text. Sound familiar to anyone?

But it was an upsetting episode. Not so much for the perky blonde doctor death, but because it really, really freaked out everyone else and Jordan was even guiltier than usual, and Devan's mum told her Devan had considered her one of her best friends, and then Jordan almost cried, and while they were sorting through the crash site and trying to find the missing kid Woody was flipping through a clipboard with the passenger manifest and telling Garrett, he was FINE, shut the fuck up, and his hands were shaking, and it was a very worried-Quinn-Mallory moment, and I just remembered how much I used to like that show and how much it pissed me off when they killed Quinn and stuck his brain in someone else's head. I hated that guy. No real reason, I just really, really did.

...There are Betazoid cats? Deanna had a kitten and Lwaxana and the cat reacted badly to one another, bwahah. Aww, Picard Horse Love, so cute. For a second I thought that was some newfangled 24th-century saddle with no girth strap, but then he pulled it out of nowhere, okay.

I have many, many better things to do. I really do. I'm going.

Also? Have Adobe CS, bwahahahgloatgloat. ;)

EDIT: I have this plastic garden gnome, about ten inches tall, who lives on top of Bugger's system tower. I call him Gougey because he has a rather disturbing facial expression of murderous glee and brandishes a shovel that appears to be encrusted with a plastic representation of something lumpy and pinkish-grey, which I think I'm supposed to assume is mud but we all know is brains. I have long suspected that he dismembers bodies and keeps the evidence at the bottom of the basket of flowers he carries slung across one shoulder. He is, of course, very dangerous, which is why he lives on the computer tower; his inherent evil is counteracted by the powerful aura of failure that emanates from Bugger's system unit, and vice versa.

Last week, whilst fiddling with the nest of cables behind the computer, I accidentally knocked him on the floor. This happens fairly often, so I picked him up and put him back, and went on about my day. This morning I noticed that part of his shovel had broken off; in fact, the blade has broken in half. I noticed this when I stepped, barefoot, on the missing piece, and hurt my foot.

My initial reaction was sort of a "hah, take *that!*" sort of thing. And then I realized that now Gougey has not only a deadly plastic brain-encrusted shovel (which apparently is not actually *plastic*, but some kind of light pottery only *painted* in latex-based paint), but is now in posession of a sharp, POINTY brain-encrusted shovel.

So if I die mysteriously one night from thousands of tiny puncture wounds and my brain has been removed, now you know what happened. I reccommend you find the gnome and grind him into sand, and scatter him to the four winds, or HE'LL GET YOU TOO. *ominous music*
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